What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
