I saw his package. It spoke to me.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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