Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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