I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Randomize
