is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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