Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
