i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
