the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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