im holly from the hills drunk
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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