Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
