Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
