If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Randomize
