She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
