I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
