would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I need to calm my uterus...
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
