i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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