super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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