Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize