At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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