Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
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