You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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