she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
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