Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize
