just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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