i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
