Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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