South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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