Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I think I died a long time ago.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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