Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
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