His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize