should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
