is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
