Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
