Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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