and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Me. At least after what I've been through.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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