You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
