so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize