I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
