just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
