Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
