I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize
