If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i used baking grease as lip gloss
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
