How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
