That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize