I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
