okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
