That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Randomize
