his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Oh god it's open bar.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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