Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Randomize
