..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
How does one acquire holy water?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
