I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
